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Understanding children’s emotional wellbeing
Children experience powerful emotions just like adults, but may not always know how to explain what they feel.
Stress, fear, conflict, uncertainty and major life changes can affect a child’s behaviour, confidence, relationships, emotions and development.
Extra support may be needed during:
Signs a child or young person may be struggling
Children show distress in different ways. Some may speak openly, while others may become quieter or hide how they feel.
Anxiety or worry
Repeated fears, panic, clinginess or needing frequent reassurance.
Low mood
Sadness, loss of interest, hopelessness or reduced confidence.
Emotional outbursts
Anger, distress, overwhelm or behaviour that feels out of character.
Withdrawal
Pulling away from friends, family, hobbies or activities they once enjoyed.
Sleep or eating changes
Difficulty sleeping, nightmares, tiredness or noticeable changes in appetite.
School difficulties
Falling attendance, trouble concentrating, avoidance or reduced progress.
Helping children feel safe and supported
Small, consistent actions from trusted adults can make a significant difference.
Stable routines
Predictable daily routines can help children feel secure.
Feeling listened to
Give children time to speak without interrupting or judging.
Calm communication
Explain changes in clear, age-appropriate language.
Trusted relationships
Support safe connections with reliable, caring adults.
Positive encouragement
Praise effort, kindness, courage and progress.
Healthy boundaries
Use clear expectations, fair consequences and calm explanations.
Support through difficult situations
Open each section for practical, child-focused guidance.
Family separation and conflict
Children may feel confused, frightened or responsible when adults separate or argue.
- Communicate respectfully and keep adult conflict away from children.
- Do not ask children to take sides, carry messages or report on another parent.
- Keep routines, boundaries and arrangements as predictable as possible.
- Support safe relationships with both parents where appropriate.
- Make clear that the separation is not the child’s fault.
Bullying and online safety
- Take concerns seriously and record what has happened.
- Speak to the school, club or platform involved.
- Help the child block or report harmful accounts and messages.
- Review privacy, location and messaging settings together.
- Reassure the child that asking for help is the right thing to do.
Mental health and emotional wellbeing
Children and young people can experience anxiety, depression, panic, stress, isolation, low confidence and emotional overwhelm.
- Listen calmly and avoid dismissing their feelings.
- Ask what support would make things feel more manageable.
- Speak to a GP, school wellbeing lead or mental health professional.
- Seek support early if difficulties are persistent or worsening.
Healthy boundaries and discipline
Healthy discipline should guide and teach rather than frighten or humiliate.
- Use clear expectations and consistent boundaries.
- Explain consequences calmly and fairly.
- Notice and praise positive behaviour.
- Avoid intimidation, humiliation, threats or emotional harm.
Building confidence and resilience
- Praise effort rather than perfection.
- Encourage safe friendships and positive role models.
- Support physical activity, creativity and new skills.
- Help children feel included, valued and able to make age-appropriate choices.
Safeguarding and child protection
Every child has the right to be safe, protected, free from abuse or neglect, and listened to when worried or frightened.
If a child may be in immediate danger or at immediate risk of serious harm, call 999.
Support services for children, young people and families
These organisations provide specialist information, listening support and signposting.
Childline
Free, confidential support for children and young people by phone and online.
Visit ChildlineNSPCC
Advice for families and help for adults worried about a child’s safety.
Visit NSPCCYoungMinds
Mental health information for young people, parents and carers.
Visit YoungMindsPlace2Be
Children and young people’s mental health support, including school-based services.
Visit Place2BeThe Mix
Information and support for young people under 25.
Visit The MixNHS
Official mental health information and routes into local support services.
Visit NHS supportMind
Mental health information, guidance and support options.
Visit MindFamily Lives
Parenting and family support, including advice during difficult periods.
Visit Family LivesRelate
Relationship and family support for adults, children and young people.
Visit RelateSupport by age
Needs and communication styles change as children grow. Support should always be adapted to the individual child.
Under 5
Ages 5–10
Ages 11–15
Ages 16–18
Ages 18–25
What to do during an emotional or mental health crisis
You do not need to solve everything immediately. Focus first on safety, breathing and getting through the next few moments.
Pause and breathe slowly
Breathe in gently for two counts, then breathe out for two counts. Repeat without rushing.
Use the 5–4–3–2–1 grounding exercise
Name five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell and one thing you can focus on.
Move to a calm, safe space
Reduce noise, move away from conflict, sit somewhere safe, get fresh air if appropriate and drink some water.
Contact someone you trust
Tell a trusted adult, family member, friend, GP, teacher, support worker or helpline: “I’m struggling right now.”
Avoid major decisions during crisis
Focus on calming and safety before trying to solve arguments, make major choices or deal with everything at once.
Reach professional support
Contact a GP, NHS 111, Childline, a school safeguarding lead or local mental health service. Call 999 if anyone is in immediate danger.
Frequently asked questions
What should I do if a child will not talk?
Stay available, calm and patient. Avoid pressuring them. Let them know they can talk, write, draw or speak to another trusted adult when ready.
When should I speak to the school?
Contact the school when worries affect attendance, learning, friendships, behaviour, safety or emotional wellbeing. Ask for the designated safeguarding lead or pastoral support team where appropriate.
When should I contact a GP?
Speak to a GP when emotional or behavioural difficulties are persistent, worsening, affecting daily life or causing concern about safety.
What if a child says they feel unsafe?
Listen carefully, take them seriously, avoid promising secrecy and seek safeguarding help. Call 999 where there is immediate danger.
How can I support a child after bullying?
Reassure them it is not their fault, record incidents, report concerns, protect their online accounts and help rebuild confidence through safe relationships and activities.
Our message
Adults may not always have every answer, but calm support, reassurance, understanding and early help can make a lasting difference in a child’s life.
Children matter.
Their wellbeing matters.
Their future matters.
Right First Time UK — general information and signposting. Always use emergency and professional services where appropriate.