Mediation & Dispute Resolution Guide

Supporting Families to Resolve Conflict Positively

Family disputes can be emotionally challenging for parents and children. Mediation and dispute resolution services aim to help families communicate more effectively, reduce conflict, and find practical solutions without unnecessary court proceedings wherever possible.

The focus should always remain on:

• The wellbeing of children
• Safe communication
• Reducing conflict
• Finding workable long-term arrangements
• Encouraging respectful co-parenting

What Is Family Mediation?

Family mediation is a voluntary process where an independent, professionally trained mediator helps parents or family members discuss disagreements and work towards agreements together.

A mediator is neutral and does not take sides or make decisions for either person.

Mediation can help families discuss:

• Child arrangements
• Parenting plans
• Communication difficulties
• Holidays and routines
• Financial arrangements
• Housing concerns
• Separation issues
• Co-parenting after separation

Mediation may help families avoid lengthy, stressful, and costly court proceedings.

What a Family Mediator Does — and Does Not Do

Benefits of Mediation

Mediation can provide:

• A calmer and more structured environment
• Better communication between parents
• Faster resolutions than court proceedings
• Reduced stress for children
• More flexible agreements
• Lower financial costs
• Greater privacy and confidentiality
• Improved co-parenting relationships
• Child-focused decision making

Where safe and appropriate, mediation encourages parents to work together respectfully and focus on long-term stability for children.

Mediation Is Not the Only Alternative to Court

The Family Procedure Rules now use the wider term Non-Court Dispute Resolution (NCDR).

GOV.UK identifies a number of possible methods of resolving family disputes without asking a court to decide everything.

Family Procedure Rules — Non-Court Resolution

Family Procedure Rule 3.3 requires the court to consider at every stage of proceedings whether non-court dispute resolution is appropriate.

The court can consider:

• Whether a MIAM took place
• Whether a valid MIAM exemption was claimed
• Whether mediation or another form of NCDR was attempted
• What happened during that process

Where the court considers NCDR appropriate, it can encourage parties to obtain information about it and undertake an appropriate process.

This does not mean that mediation is suitable in every case. Safety and safeguarding issues remain important.

When Mediation May Not Be Suitable

Mediation may not be appropriate where there is:

• Domestic abuse
• Coercive or controlling behaviour
• Serious safeguarding concerns
• Significant power imbalance
• Fear or intimidation
• Ongoing unsafe behaviour
• Risks to children or adults

In these situations, specialist support, safeguarding services, or court intervention may be necessary.

The safety and wellbeing of children and adults must always come first.

What Is a MIAM?

Before making many applications to family court in England and Wales, parents are usually expected to attend a:

Mediation Information & Assessment Meeting (MIAM)

A MIAM is a meeting with a trained mediator to:

• Explain how mediation works
• Assess whether mediation is suitable
• Discuss family circumstances safely
• Explore alternatives to court where appropriate

A MIAM does not mean parents must continue with mediation.

MIAM Exemptions

A MIAM is not required in every case.

Family Procedure Rule 3.8 contains a number of exemptions. Depending on the circumstances, these may include:

• Specified evidence of domestic abuse
• Certain child-protection circumstances, including some cases involving section 47 enquiries or a child protection plan
• Urgent situations involving risk to life, liberty or physical safety
• Risk of harm to a child
• Risk of unlawful removal of a child from the United Kingdom
• Significant risk of a miscarriage of justice
• Specified circumstances involving serious financial hardship
• Certain without-notice applications
• Recent attendance at a MIAM or qualifying non-court dispute resolution process concerning substantially the same dispute
• Certain accessibility or geographical circumstances where an authorised mediator cannot reasonably be accessed

Up to £500 Towards Family Mediation

The Government's Family Mediation Voucher Scheme can currently provide eligible families with a contribution of up to £500 towards mediation.

GOV.UK states that the voucher is usually available regardless of earnings where the case qualifies.

Important points include:

• The voucher is worth up to £500 towards mediation sessions.
• It is normally one voucher per family or case.
• It cannot normally be used to pay for the MIAM itself.
• The mediator applies for the funding rather than giving the family a physical voucher.
• Funding is subject to eligibility and availability.
• The £500 may not cover every mediation session needed.

In May 2026 the Government announced a further extension of the scheme.

Practice Direction 36V currently provides for the pilot scheme to continue until the end of 31 March 2029.

Legal Aid for Family Mediation

Some people may qualify for legal aid to help pay for family mediation.

GOV.UK confirms that family mediation is one of the areas for which legal aid may be available, subject to the applicable eligibility rules.

Privacy & Confidentiality in Mediation

Family mediation is generally a confidential process.

However, confidentiality is not absolute.

The Family Mediation Council Code of Practice includes circumstances where information may have to be disclosed, including:

• A court order requiring disclosure
• A legal obligation requiring disclosure
• Serious child safeguarding concerns
• Situations involving significant risk of harm

Child-Focused Dispute Resolution

When resolving family disputes, parents are encouraged to:

• Keep children away from adult conflict
• Avoid negative comments about the other parent
• Maintain routines and stability
• Encourage healthy relationships where safe
• Communicate calmly and respectfully
• Focus on long-term wellbeing rather than “winning”

Children benefit most when adults reduce conflict and work together positively.

Child-Inclusive Mediation

Some mediation cases can involve Child-Inclusive Mediation.

This can allow a child or young person to express their wishes, feelings and views to a properly trained mediator.

The purpose is not to make the child responsible for deciding the dispute.

Parents remain responsible for adult decisions, but the child's voice can help inform those decisions.

Our Child's Plan

Cafcass provides a free resource called Our Child's Plan, previously known as a Parenting Plan.

Where safe and appropriate, parents can use it to work through arrangements concerning:

• Where a child spends time
• Routines
• Education
• Health
• Communication
• Special occasions
• Activities
• Future changes

It can be useful alongside mediation or other child-focused dispute resolution.

Going to Family Court

Sometimes court proceedings may still become necessary, particularly where:

• Agreements cannot be reached
• Safeguarding concerns exist
• Domestic abuse allegations are involved
• One parent refuses communication
• Child welfare concerns arise

The family court’s primary concern is always:

The best interests of the child

Court proceedings can be stressful, lengthy, and emotionally difficult for families. Mediation and dispute resolution are encouraged wherever safe and appropriate before court action is taken.

If Mediation Does Not Resolve the Dispute

Mediation does not take away the right to ask the Family Court to decide a matter where an agreement cannot be reached.

Depending on the dispute, next steps may include:

• Obtaining legal advice
• Trying another appropriate form of NCDR
• Applying for a Child Arrangements Order
• Applying for a Specific Issue Order
• Applying for a Prohibited Steps Order
• Applying to vary an existing order
• Seeking urgent court intervention where required

Is a Mediation Agreement Legally Binding?

An agreement reached through mediation is not automatically the same as a Family Court order.

Where appropriate, legal advice can be obtained about making an agreement legally binding.

GOV.UK explains that where separated parents reach agreement, a solicitor can help draft a consent order which can then be submitted to the court for approval.

If a Court Order Already Exists

Mediation can sometimes help parents discuss proposed changes to an existing arrangement.

However, an informal agreement does not necessarily replace an existing enforceable court order.

GOV.UK explains that parents can agree to operate differently from an existing order, but the new arrangement may not itself be enforceable unless it is made legally binding.

Where appropriate, parents can ask the court to approve an agreed variation through a consent order, or apply to vary the order where agreement cannot be reached.

Mediation Can Still Happen After Court Proceedings Begin

Starting Family Court proceedings does not necessarily mean that attempts to reach agreement must stop.

The court must continue considering whether NCDR is appropriate throughout proceedings.

GOV.UK also explains that if parents reach agreement during court proceedings, the judge or magistrates may be able to bring the contested process to an end and make an appropriate consent order where necessary.

Parenting After Separation

Even after separation, many parents can successfully co-parent by:

• Creating consistent routines
• Sharing important information
• Respecting boundaries
• Attending school or health appointments cooperatively
• Communicating child-focused decisions calmly
• Supporting children emotionally through change

Children often cope better with separation when conflict between parents is reduced.

Preparing for Mediation

Where mediation is safe and appropriate, preparation can help keep discussions productive.

• Write down the main issues you want to resolve.
• Separate child-related issues from unrelated disputes.
• Think about what arrangements would work practically.
• Consider the child's routine, schooling and activities.
• Think about travel and handover arrangements.
• Bring relevant financial information where finances are involved.
• Bring a copy of any existing Family Court order.
• Identify which issues you agree about already.
• Identify the issues that actually need resolving.
• Try to focus on future arrangements rather than relitigating every past argument.
• Ask the mediator about safety arrangements if direct discussion is difficult.
• Ask about costs before mediation starts.
• Ask whether the £500 voucher may apply.
• Check whether legal aid may be available.
• Consider obtaining independent legal advice where necessary.

Mediation & Family Support Services

Family Mediation Services

Family Court & Legal Information

Parenting & Relationship Support

Domestic Abuse & Safety

No parent or child should feel pressured into mediation where there is abuse or fear.

Domestic abuse can include:

• Physical violence
• Emotional abuse
• Coercive control
• Financial abuse
• Threats and intimidation
• Isolation
• Harassment or stalking

If you or your children are in immediate danger, call 999.

Domestic Abuse Support

Safeguarding Children

Mediation should not be used as a substitute for appropriate safeguarding action.

If you are concerned that a child is at risk of abuse or neglect, GOV.UK advises contacting the children's social care team at the child's local council.

You do not need to be certain that abuse has happened before reporting a genuine safeguarding concern.

Immediate Danger

If you or a child is in immediate danger, call 999.

If you cannot speak when calling 999 from a mobile, listen to the operator's instructions.

Where the Silent Solution applies, you may be instructed to press 55 so your call can be transferred to the police.

Do not delay obtaining emergency or safeguarding assistance because mediation is underway or has been suggested.

A Simple Dispute Resolution Route

1. Identify the problem.
   Separate the issues that genuinely need resolving.
2. Consider safety first.
   Identify domestic abuse, safeguarding, coercive control or urgent concerns before trying joint dispute resolution.
3. Try safe direct agreement where appropriate.
4. Consider a MIAM.
   Find out which non-court options may suit the dispute.
5. Check whether a MIAM exemption applies.
6. Check the £500 mediation voucher.
7. Check legal aid.
8. Consider mediation or another form of NCDR.
9. Put children at the centre of discussions.
10. Record any agreement clearly.
11. Obtain legal advice where necessary.
12. Consider a consent order if an agreement needs to become legally binding.
13. Use the Family Court where agreement cannot safely or reasonably be achieved.

Final Message

Family disputes can be difficult, but many families are able to move forward positively with the right support, communication, and guidance.

Mediation and dispute resolution can help reduce conflict, improve co-parenting, and support better outcomes for children wherever it is safe and appropriate to do so.

Every child deserves stability, safety, and the opportunity to maintain healthy family relationships free from ongoing conflict.

Resolving a dispute does not mean one parent has to "win" and the other has to "lose".

Where it is safe, the objective should be to find workable arrangements which protect children's welfare and reduce unnecessary conflict.

Where abuse, intimidation or safeguarding risks exist, the priority must change from reaching agreement to ensuring safety and protection.